The latest chapter in the ongoing saga of the Incredible Shrinking Woman. Also, further evidence that the fashion/clothing industry is insane:
Amongst the latest batch of stuff of mine that I picked up from chez kettunainen
was a tape measure. This morning, catching sight of it, it occurred to me that it had been a while since I last took my measurements. Also, that I have been finding my formerly best-fitting bra to be a little bit loose these days, and thus entertaining suspicions that I may have gone down a band size and/or cup size. Going down a cup size would actually be excellent news, in that it would make me a DD and thus back into the realm of being able to buy bras in normal stores.
So, I started measuring. First discovery was that yes, I am indeed smaller in all horizontal dimensions than last time I did this. The last measurements I can remember taking, a couple of years ago, were something like 44-34-47. That was after
having lost some weight already.. Today's results: 42-32-42. I do believe this is the first time in my life that my bust and hip measurements have ever been the same. Also, it is no longer surprising to me that none of my pants fit any more, if I've lost two inches off my waist and five
off my hips.
Next, the underbust measurement that is compared to the bust measurement to calculate bra size -- bearing in mind that just doing it on a chart is not always reliable, and that serious bra-fu is required if you want a really good fit. Anyway: 34".
So, I hit google and begin looking up bra size charts. The first one attempts to tell me that I am a 38D. This seems suspicious to me, so I experiment a bit and discover that D is the largest size it has - you could (theoretically) have a 20" difference between your bust and underbust measurements and it would still tell you you were a D. D is actually supposed to reflect a 4" difference. I have an 8"
So I try another, from a site that I have heard before carries a wide range of sizes. That one lists an 8" difference as "FF". Never seen a double F before -- I was a 38F last I checked (having been sized by a bra-fu master at a store that sadly no longer exists). But cup sizes vary wildly between different countries: an F in European sizes (which rather sensible go through the alphabet in the normal fashion instead of randomly doubling letters) is an E in UK sizes, where they have double D and then go on to E, and a DDD in US sizes, although in my experience US DDD bras never actually fit me -- they seem to be designed on the assumption that anyone with large breasts is also large all over, probably due to the, er, peculiarities of the average American physique these days.
So I look over the rest of the chart, trying to make sense of this - to find that the version this site is using goes up to DDDD, which I have also seen, and then straight to FF without actually hitting E or F on the way. Who on earth thinks up these things? But it was when I compared their version of US sizing to the European sizing with which I am more familiar that the true WTF-ness of the situation began to sink in: DD = E, DDD = F, DDDD = G, FF = H!
How is it even remotely possible that, having lost
two inches from my bust since being sized as a 38 F, I am now two freaking cup sizes larger?!
Although, according to this site's idea of band size, two band sizes smaller?
I check another site that deals with the full range of sizes for comparison, after an interval of trying a few more that either stop at DD or list any size larger than a certain cutoff as "etc." But it does indeed seem that an 8" difference between underbust and bust classes one as an H, though other sites say that a 34" underbust measurement is actually a band size of 38.
I measure again, a couple of times, trying to make sure that I haven't made some grievous error, and the first time get 42 again for the bust while the second time I get 41 (the underbust measurement stays the same both times). I guess it depends a bit on how you hold the tape measure. But even 41 would still put me as a G.
So I am apparently supposed to believe that while my bust measurement has gotten smaller, my cup size has gotten larger while my band size has stayed the same.
I think that instead I will choose to believe that bra sizing charts are fucking useless, and that I need to take foxesdaughter
's recommendation of visiting her bra-fu master on the Danforth. Whenever I next have some disposable income, anyway...
P.S. Courtesy of poisoninjest
, I have found the perfect userpic for posts such as this...